Cinerama Cup: Preliminary Group 2

   

The second group of covers, etc. voted for 'Eurovision' style (see the previous post)...

Preliminary Group 2

• Larry's 
• Edinburgh
• 524 Fidelio
• Always The Quiet One
• Meet Cute
• Nickels And Dimes
• Back a Bit...Stop
• You Jane
• Deer Caught in the Headlights
• You're Dead
• Diamonds Are Forever
• Yesterday Once More
• Elenore

There's a good reason why these songs have gone through this preliminary stage, and I'm sure the panel will be relieved when we get to the 'proper' groups. Dave, for example, found this set 'really difficult to rate, probably because about 7 of them deserved a 0.' Or, as Kirk put it:

'This is a far weaker set of songs than the first lot and I'd easily give them all zeros if I could. The worst thing about this round was having to listen to some of these more than once to rank them against each other.'

Steve M's view:

'When the third "best" song gets on the virtual podium because (as I scribbled down) it has "passable strings" you know we're in a bad place.'

Ouch.

Anyway, at least nobody could accuse us of not doing this properly. And let's remember, there are some fantastic songs on the horizon...

The Results

The final table fell into a fairly predictable pattern: the half dozen tracks from Valentina ('uber-dross' according to Steve M) filled the bottom six places; the songs recorded for John Peel in the couple of years before the return of TWP largely dominated the top; the cover versions were sandwiched in between.

There was a small smattering of higher marks for the Valentina songs. However, these scores need to be taken in the context of the judges struggling to find any tracks worthy of decent marks. For example, although Kirk gave 'You're Dead' a ten, he didn't exactly smother it in praise: 'chorus with the brass is ok.' Bob thought it 'infinitely better than the original, while still managing to be quite sh*t.' Ian described it as 'music for lifts and department store toilets.'

On my blog, I had 'Back a Bit...Stop' in bottom place, a decision that Gricey clearly had no issue with: '[The Valentina tracks] are just sooo bad but "Back a Bit" deserves a special rotten tomato. Everything about it deserves to be nuked.' Keg was also less than keen: 'Heavy on the stilton. Like a bedroom demo of someone's idea of a Style Council pastiche. Just sounds a mess.' 'Could we not,' pondered Marc, 'just focus on the "stop" bit?' Mike, on the other hand, thought it 'the best of the Valentina reworkings.'

'524 Fidelio' received a little more praise than the others. Ian considered it worthy of seven points 'for effort - 7/4 is tricky in anyone's money.' 'Pleasant, inoffensive loungetastic fayre' was Keg's view. Johnny liked 'how the chorus lifts and semi-soars,' but concluded that although 'the ingredients are there, the execution is mangled.' Dave thought it sounded like 'it was recorded inside an empty biscuit tin.'

The other Valentina reworkings attracted a range of similarly disparaging comments. Marc wondered why 'Deer Caught in the Headlights' 'fades out only to come back again - hadn't we suffered enough?' Bob dismissed 'Meet Cute' with the characteristically blunt (if uncharacteristically non-sweary) comment 'just not good.' 'You Jane' - 'plodding swinge dirge' according to Keg - faced the ignominy of finishing last in such a meagre selection. 'Some of these Valentina tracks,' noted Harry, 'are earning points purely because they must according to the rules.'

The three cover versions were, score-wise, doubtlessly flattered by the company in which they found themselves. Derek and Kirk did both give 'Diamonds Are Forever' a 12, although the latter went on to say that 'the fact that I can’t rate anything above this speaks volumes about the dross it’s up against.' 'I don't get DLG's obsession with the often tiresome and trite James Bond oeuvre,' commented Keg, 'however, this is quite nicely done as a passing curio.' Harry preferred it to the original, mainly because of his 'loathing for Shirley Bassey... It doesn't make it good, just less bad.'

Steve M liked 'Yesterday Once More' ('just for the outro really'), but the best that Ian could say was that 'they didn't murder it.' 'They must have run out of money for the studio meter,' suggested Harry, 'if they didn't go for another vocal take on this.' Cinerama's cover of The Turtle's 1968 single 'Elenore' was largely met with indifference. 'Passable' was Johnny's verdict; Kirk found it 'drab'; 'pleasant but a bit lightweight' thought Keg.

As for the 2003 Peel session tracks, 'Larry's' was the only one that didn't score highly overall. Johnny, though, was a fan:

'I really do love this. The underlying intrigue of life is how it all ends, and this is it, bold as brass, laid bare in gloriously fragile, desperate aural technicolour. It’s heartbreaking, it’s gut wrenching, it’s over, it’s the end. Magnificent.'

Keg was another champion of the song:

'This song's tale of obsessive behaviour in the throes of bewildering relationship bereavement is one of the most gut-wrenching songs in the DLG canon. A softer reading than the WP version I know and love. My ears miss Terry's Beatle-esque backing vocals in the closing section but it's still magnificent.'

Others disagreed. 'I cannot see the appeal,' said Marc, 'of such a dirge.' Steve M was even more forthright: 'A bad version of a bad song, done badly, on a bad day, in Badsville. Ugh.'

'Nickels and Dimes' attracted generally decent marks, but still fell a long way short of the top two. Predictably, 'Always The Quiet One' and 'Edinburgh' made it through to the main stage, the latter by virtue of outscoring 'Erinner Dich', the runner-up in the other preliminary group (by 172 - 145).

Well, I'm sure we're all glad that that's all over. But at least we all know we've been thorough. Things, as they say, can only get better...

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